Female Chauvinist Pig
As long as I can remember, people have been complaining about the declining moral state of our society. Sometimes, I have been one of the complainers, and sometimes I have been the naysayer. However, with an increased sexual content in music, movies and magazines, it's tough to tell someone that everything is okay.

Teenage boys and young men are often seen as the troublemakers (ie. too easily embracing violence, drug abuse and alcoholism), but mostly in a legal sense, moreso than a moral sense. (Certainly civil obedience can never be fully separated from morality, but they are often seen as two different levels of the same problem). The moral decline that I hear the most about is most evident in teenage girls and young women. I don't see this as a double standard, but more of a continuation of the historical upholding of women as the preservers of culture. Of the cultural/ethnic/religious immigrant groups where clothing is somehow related to a belief system, the women are almost always more visibly different from the mainstream than the men, and they are also usually the slowest ones to acculturate. So I think it's only natural that people would resist a shifting cultural tide when it becomes most evident in that society's women.

A more thorough discussion of the depth of the "problem" is provided in a recent Maclean's article with the same title as this post. It generated quite a few responses in the next issue. Here are some of them, as well as my own.

One reader agreed in principle with the issue, but that the best remedy for the media would be to uphold intelligent, witty and dignified young women, instead of pointing out the flaws of the bad ones. A valid point, too bad smut sells more magazines then upholding morality.

One woman called for more leniancy toward people who do stupid things in bars, saying that momentary stupidity shouldn't be held against people.

Many of the respondents were women expressing their frustration at the same issue with varying degrees of hope for future generations. Hope for the future was often stifled by fear of what coming fads would bring.

Particularly encouraging was that most people blame the girls themselves for dressing and behaving in this way. Too often I hear teachers, youth workers and the young girls and women themselves blaming young men and boys for this trend. Certainly young men "benefit" from the plunging necklines and waistlines and the eye candy that is revealed. However, it is ridiculous to suggest that this generation of young men want it or appreciate it more, or that they are any more influential toward the outfits their female counterparts wear. It doesn't matter if it's 50, 20, or 5 years ago, young men want to see what they always want to see, more skin. Young women need to know that the attention they crave is only attention, nothing more. Attention that is derived from appearance is not respect, it's not adoration and it certainly isn't love, it's only attention. Those other things are not tied to attention, and in many circles there is an inverse relationship.

That being said, I truly believe that this is a trend that will soon pass. The bell bottoms fad passed, and then passed again, and then passed again. Mini-skirts came and went. Low-cut jeans, thongs and 3/4 tops will pass too. Perhaps because of an intentional strategy by some particular group, or perhaps its time will simply pass. The way I see it, the problem is low self worth on the individual level, not slipping morality on a universal level, and it should be addressed as such.

   [ posted by William @ 11:17 AM ]

Clouded by the Presents
This is an excerpt from my sermon on Sunday. Our recurring them was "Lead on, Cloud of Presence: Life on the Road". Part of my imagery was contrasting two driving incidents I've had. One where I rolled my car and this other time.

My more recent brush with automobile peril ended more safely, but my mindset was different. I wasn't convinced that I would be fine. I knew I was capable of losing control. Despite the cold, dark night, I was ready to climb out of a broken car and get help. I knew that if I wiped out, it would be mostly my fault. I knew that I would face criticism from my girlfriend, my family, and likely some of you. My focus was on straightening out my car, but I knew that if I didn’t, life would go on.
Maybe it’s because this time my car had collision insurance. Maybe it’s because this was my second time through. Or maybe it was something else.

Earlier in the spring, my mechanic took my car out for a spin and told me that my transmission was on its last legs. I don’t know why I keep buying Fords. I knew that I couldn’t afford to buy a new car and I couldn’t afford to replace or rebuild a transmission. So when I got home and parked my car, I got out and walked around to the front, put my hand on the hood and said, “Look, I need you to keep working, so here’s the deal. I’ll drive gently, and I won’t rush you when you need to change gears, but I need you to hold out for a little while. When it’s time for you to give up, I’ll be okay with it.” I’m not making this up; I actually did say that. My mechanic said I’d be lucky if it lasted another month. That was a year and a half ago. Everyday since than has been a bonus.

What do we as human beings deserve from God? In the Lord’s Prayer, Jesus taught the disciples to ask for daily bread, forgiveness, and deliverance from evil. Everything beyond that is bonus, it’s unexpected, it’s grace.

The Israelites in the desert lost sight of that grace, they expected the unexpected and complained when their bonus wasn’t big enough. Standing at the Red Sea, the Israelites quickly forgot about the grace they had been given. Instead of turning their face toward God, they turned their face toward their troubles. They didn’t think God would save them, but they have forgotten that God had already saved them quite a few times, and would save them quite a few times again.

When your car loses control, you keep your wheels faced toward where you want to go. What I needed to do was forget about the car, forget the consequences. I needed to look away from things that were troubling me, and look toward where I wanted to go.

In our troubles, we need to turn ourselves toward where we want to go. We need to turn our face toward God. We need to focus our ears toward what God is saying, focus our eyes on what God is doing. We do that through prayer and meditation, through regular Bible reading, through giving of ourselves to those around us in need. It also means turning away from our fears, turning away from our material comforts, and turning away from our selfishness and discontent.

   [ posted by William @ 12:04 PM ]

Faux-to lab dot CA
Ana and I are developing pictures from time to time to be used in various wedding stuff. Since we were going to be away from the big city for a bit, we decided it would be most efficient to develop our digital pictures electronically. To do this, we went to the website for our grocery store where we develop pictures most frequently. From there we were directed to another website, for the company that actually does their photo developing. I uploaded the image I wanted developed, chose the print size and quantity and filled in our name and phone number and the store of pick-up. Immediately we were sent a confirmation email that our order had been received. A few days later I went in to pick our picture. This is when I learned that I had set my expectations too high.

If I were to drop in, and using the machine give them the digital file, my 8x10 image would be ready in about 24 hours. I would think that doing it online, they would direct that digital file to the store I chose. I would think that I could get that same 24 hours service, but with the added convenience of ordering it from home. It turns out that our picture wasn't ready yet. The girl at the counter told us to expect another email at which point it would be ready. Apparently the pictures are received and developed at the head office in MIssissauga and then mailed to the appropriate store. Does that seem like anyone else to be the least efficient option possible? Would it really be difficult to set up a system where those files are electronically sent to the stores? I worked in retail, and the head office is constantly sending electronic files, and I don't see why this couldn't be one of them.

After receiving another e-mail, we went in again to find that it still wasn't ready. Sure we didn't read the email, but it was from the same company saying that our photo had been developed. At that point, 5 days later, it had only been developed and was being shipped to the store. A third visit, almost two weeks later, produced the photo that we were hoping for.

I could not believe the inefficient nature of their supposedly high-tec service. I refuse to use their service again and I'll try to find a place that prints my emailed digital files as efficiently as is necessary.

   [ posted by William @ 12:13 PM ]

Mus-eum-ings
I volunteer at a local Mennonite Museum where various tourists drop in to watch an educational video and wander through the self-guiding exhibit. I would love to be a guide and explain the exhibits as the guests walk through, but the nature of the place is that I need to stay at the front door, start the video for people and answer questions. I encourage people to come to me with their questions after their walk through and I also welcome people's questions as they enter off the street. The questions deal almost exclusively with the stereotypical Amish and Old Order Mennonite lifestyle of the local residents who inadvertently draw the tourists in to town in the first place. At my post this past Sunday, I had some interesting conversations which I will try to transcribe here.

The first guy explained that he grew up in Romania. He looked to be in his mid thirties. He wasn't really all that drawn to Mennonites perse, but he wanted to see people who lived a similar lifestyle to what he saw in Romania in his childhood. He saw the Amish lifestyle as "romantic" because of his own upbringing instead of a glamourized Hollywood portrayal somewhere. He didn't see it as an honourable way of life or a cutesy lifestyle. The voluntary nature of their way of living was irrelevant because it reminded him of a time when he lived that way as a result of poverty, not as an act of conscience.
When he asked why there weren't out and about, I told him that they would all be home resting or visiting with other people since it was the Sabbath. He corrected me saying that the Sabbath was the day before. I wasn't going to get into it over that, and he knew what I meant, so I let it go.

The next couple was of Japanese origin. First the husband showed me a brochure of the town and asked me how to pronounce the name in English. After I said it carefully, he began repeating it until he felt he had adequately got it. Then his wife explained to me the appearance of a couple she had seen earlier on the sidewalk. She asked me which religion they were. I explained that they were likely from a conservative group of Mennonites. Upon hearing that her husband asked me to explain to him their way of life. As I outlined to him a few details, he nodded his head as though he already knew what I was going to say, but still astonished that I was saying it. Afterwards he said that other people had told him about Mennonites before, but he didn't believe it.

The final couple of note was a Welsch couple who had since moved to Canada. They noted to me how silly it seemed to them as Europeans that this 200 year old town with its Victorian era-esque shops, was a historical destination for tourists. They went to explain that life in the "New World" made them appreciate the historial value of European town when they go back to visit. They also learned to appreciate more sentimental moments like watching a sunset or spending time with family and friends. They were drawn to observe the Mennonite way of life because of those values. They also went to discuss the declining morality in the Western World. They bemoaned the fact that the era of individuals' rights was beginning to fail and that perhaps another method would be best suited for the present reality. The interesting part was that their displeasure had arisen from being mistreated themselves, from a moral superiority, or even from religious convictions, they were simply observations.

I think that I often get more out of my few hours of volunteering than the tourists who drop in with questions.

   [ posted by William @ 12:31 AM ]

NO LONGER WANTED: A job in Tavistock that has somewhat something to do with my degree

Wow, sometimes things just come together, and I wonder why I ever worried in the first place.

Just as I was beginning to give up on the prospect of finding meaningful work in Tavistock, I got a call from Bonnie Brae (a nursing home right in town here), probably a 5 minute walk from where our apartment is. They not only want me to be a nurses aid (something that does not require school training), but they want to use my skills in music, chaplaincy and social development, sort of creating a new position for me. In other words, I will be doing music with the residents, such as playing my songs, teaching guitar and leading singing, along with filling in for the chaplain, making visitations, and being a nurses aid. I couldn't ask for a better job right now, that utilizes my skills and experience. God is amazing.

Alongside that excitement, Will and I get to start moving into our apartment today, and my piano will be brought today as well. We'll be doing some cleaning and some painting (hopedully), to get it ready for October 1st, when one of us will move in. It might be me because of this job, but we have yet to decide that.

As for wedding planning, the latest exciting development is that Will and I booked our honeymoon sight and plane tickets. Yet another reminder that this is actually happening, and it couldn't feel more right.

   [ posted by Anabee @ 8:20 AM ]

Vive la difference?
Within my Christian religious and social experience, there are certain categories of stories that are told, albeit genuinely but still easily categorizable.

First is the genre of the testimony, within which there are two extremes, one more dramatic and one more common. The majority of testimonies (personal stories of one's coming to the Christian faith) follow some variation of the "I grew up in a Christian home and my faith was shaped by pastor A, parent B, sibling C and/or Christian friend D." That's roughly my story, and there is nothing wrong with it, it's just not entertaining. Those stories affirm parents, churches and communities, but are rather boring. The famous testimonies are the more dramatic ones, involving a lifestyle of rebellion and radical conversion, turning from a life of drugs, sex, self-indulgence, dancing, addiction to reality TV, etc. to Christianity through a certain book, movie/TV show, or newfound Christian friend. These stories reaffirm the evils of the outside world, the powers of its various vices, and most importantly, the power of faith and the viability of (that church's view of) Christianity in the present context.

The second genre, and the one I've been thinking about a lot lately, is what I call the testimony compliment, the testimony through the eyes of the Christian friend who provided the critical spiritual influence. What's interesting is that in theory, we should never hear these stories. It seems in most Christian understandings that individual people are only channels by which God/Jesus/the Holy Spirit actually does the inspiring. In short, no Christian can take credit for the conversion of another Christian. While few people will admit to doing that in the telling of their testimony compliment, they are still huge sources of unhealthy Christian pride and envy. People start counting their jewels on their heavenly crown before they even get there.

The key phrase in a testimony compliment is "There's something different about you." It's almost as though that moment affirms their Christianity. These stories are told to encourage others to continue "evangelizing" and living the Christian life. What can happen as a result instead, is that it creates a dualism of Christians that win souls and Christians that don't. Too often the focus is on winning more souls rather than more souls being won. I do think that Christians are called to be different, and I take it as a compliment when I've been told that I am different in that way. I can't help thinking though that "you're different from other Christians" is as much an insult to other Christians as it is a compliment, and it could mean, "you're not a good Christian." in the institutional sense of the word

I have no problem with evangelism, but I have a big problem with pride, especially in a Christian context. If you've been influenced by someone else, thank them and tell other people. If you've influenced others, keep doing it, don't brag about it.

   [ posted by William @ 11:52 AM ]

Kanye, Can I talk to you for a minute?
Our newspapers are continually filled with stories of disasters from all around the world, both naturally and mechanical caused. When these events occur, here and abroad, I have noticed a disturbing trend. The process rarely deviates from it. First the event happens, then the suffering begins, followed by the media responding by telling the story, followed by the various political responses, followed by the public response and finally the public forgetting, and meanwhile the suffering continues.

The political response has been made and now come the detractors. It is automatic, and not always genuine. What sickens me even more is the automatic and equally ingenuine public response to the political response. I too think that the government response was too slow to the humanitarian crisis. I would likely not have voted for the man, but his opposition all sounds the same to me. I don't like the way he runs the USA, but I refuse to join the "Bush is a moron" bandwagon.

Kanye West recently verbally attacked President Bush on a televised benefit concert. He said "George Bush doesn't care about black people", that America is set up "to help the poor, the black people, the less well-off as slow as possible", and "I hate the way they portray us in the media. If you see a black family, it says they're looting. See a white family, it says they're looking for food." I think it's too simplistic to right off the apparent inaction as racism on behalf of government leadership. In a capitalist society, governments respond as quickly or quicker to the economic result of a disaster than they do to the humanitarian crisis. The poor people left behind are left out of this economic process, whether they are black, white, Hispanic, etc. To a large degree, race and poverty are related in the US, but not intrinsically.

I like Kanye West, actually I only like his song "Jesus Walks" because it presents a refreshing Christology. However, these politically charged statements coinciding with the release of his new album just don't cut it with me. Also, with the content of most of his music and videos, he's the last person to complain about negative black stereotypes.

I know, I know, I'm not doing anything either. I'm sitting here in my cozy, Caucasian, Canadian climate, blogging about things unseen, but I'm tired of seeing people further their political, musical or environmental agenda through this tragedy.

Kanye, I wanted something beautiful. Something that the kids will love when they hear it to make them start jumping up and down and sharing candy and stuff.

   [ posted by William @ 6:50 PM ]

To be-moan the foam...groan

I was telling Will that I should have a "Catastrophe" series on this blog, because there seem to be enough disasters to sustain it's own section.

So, Will and I were house sitting for my dad, and of course I want to keep things even nicer than I found them. I decided to run the dishwasher. I put some Sunlight in, closed it and turned it on. Should be fine, right? Well, I was in the midst of making cookies when I noticed a LOT of foam on the floor, coming out of both sides of the dishwasher. Ah! All I could do was call Will's name helplessly. We both grabbed mops and mopped away at the foam. That should be good, we thought. I decided to open the dishwasher, and out came pouring MORE foam, and the entire inside of the dishwasher was FOAM, we could hardly see the dishes! Oops. Will turns to me and says, "Did you put regular dish detergent in?" "......yes..." I replied sheepishly. Problem solved, but foam still foaming. Will grabbed the shop vac and that seemed to deal with the foam quite well. Then I noticed all the foam draining to a particular crack in the floor. Calling to Will in the basement underneath the kitchen, "Will? Do you see a leak down there?" After a pause, "Yeah!" Great......He sucked it all up and that seemed to take care of the problem.

What did I learn from this? Always wash dishes by hand!

   [ posted by Anabee @ 9:36 PM ]

NO LONGER WANTED: An apartment in Tavi

Well! Will and I very excitedly found an apartment in Tavistock today! It is a loft apartment in an old school house behind a nursing home. Very quaint. The building is very old, which we like. This was a big hurdle to overcome, and we did it, so that was a relief.

I am now currently looking for work either in Tavi or Stratford, which is usually an exhausting process. It's been going okay, but whenever I look for work I am reminded of how unqualified I feel for most jobs. I've done all sorts of random jobs that have nothing to do with each other (interpreting at a heritage site, chaplaincy at a nursing home, landscaping, serving drinks on a train, Vacation Bible School and archiving, to name a few) that I feel like I'm pretty good at lots of different things, but not extremely good at one or two things. Ironically, none of the jobs I've done (except chaplaincy, I guess) have anything to do with my degree in Social Development Studies. This always leaves me feeliing pretty overwhelmed when job hunting. Oh well. I'm sure I'll find something.

I guess I could say:
WANTED: A job that remotely has somewhat something to do with my degree.

   [ posted by Anabee @ 5:46 PM ]